Working with Boys' Spirituality
‘Educating and raising boys is a value-laden enterprise – homes and schools are not neutral places of teaching and learning but rather settings that shape a boy’s identity.’ Michael Nagel
Spirituality is an important aspect of a young child’s holistic learning, linking to autonomy, compassion, resilience, responsibility and wellbeing. Spiritual development encourages a child’s deeper understanding of his/herself and others and helps children to gain an appreciation of their place in the wider world.
The last couple of decades have arguably been increasingly challenging for boys due to negative portrayals of maleness and masculinity. This is exacerbated by limited opportunities in Western societies for boys to engage with questions of purpose, explore issues of boyhood, masculinity and growing up male, or participate in activities delineating stages of growth and development.
What is often omitted are opportunities to discuss what is happening with boys neurologically and how this influences who they are and how they might act. Parents and schools should look to enhance the spiritual lives of boys by providing such opportunities.
Working with boys spiritually must allow for boys to explore the following sorts of questions, all about one’s purpose and meaning in life:
- Who am I?
- Why am I here?
- What does it mean to be male?
- What is masculinity?
- What will happen to me as I grow from boyhood to manhood?
- Is there more to ‘Life’ than mere existence?
- How do ‘belief and faith’ fashion our attitude to life?
Across cultures and history, many of these types of questions were explored through the family or various rites of passage. By contrast, twenty-first century Western society does not do a very good job at imbuing these developmental transitions with spiritual meaning. The lack of ceremonies or rituals signalling a transition to adulthood may be a precursor to a variety of social problems.
In many respects, the omission of rites of passage is a fundamental issue in how we work with boys spiritually. We give boys very little opportunity to participate in activities focusing on who they are and who they are becoming. We also do not provide many opportunities to celebrate transitions and in particular the important transition from being a boy to becoming a man.
Attaining legal majority, in terms of the ability to drink alcohol, drive a car, or vote, often becomes the default signal of adulthood, but this kind of ‘civic’ milestone is not standard across regions and offers little in the way of a meaningful recognition of social and personal transition. This lack of formal rites of passage has meant many boys are learning how to be a man via the media, reality shows and the internet.
What is needed, therefore, are opportunities for boys to explore what it means to be, and to be male, and for those boys entering puberty to experience some form of closure to childhood and a welcoming to manhood. Importantly, such opportunities should be about defining a path forward rather than focusing on past achievements, and schools offer a great context for such work.
Rites of passage at Mosman Prep include:
- Structured opportunities in Social and Emotional Learning lessons for boys to discuss what it means to be male or what a ‘good man’ looks like.
- Year 4-6 GoodCHAP service learning project where boys initiate and complete 10 hours of outside school social action.
- Camps such as the Year 5 Coffs Harbour Trip, and Year 6 Pack and Paddle Adventure and trip to Uluru or Japan, requiring boys to work together, offering a rich context for spiritual growth and personal development as well as a context for various rites of passage activities.
- Year 5 and 6 Sailing Program.
- Year 5 and Year 6 Leadership Courses with Queenwood.
- Year 6 Valedictory Dinner at Manly Golf Club where each boy speaks about his Prep journey.
- Regular age appropriate Worship opportunities and Scripture teaching.
Central to working with boys spiritually at Mosman Prep is helping them understand the truth about God, society, and the world around them. This provides them with a deeper understanding of their place, purpose and value, empowering them to thrive and live a life beyond themselves by serving God and others.
With Christian faith as our foundation, we focus on developing and strengthening positive relationships, honourable character, pursuit of excellence and commitment to contribute to the lives of others. This creates a sense of belonging and self-identity that lays the foundations for academic, physical, social, emotional, and spiritual development.
Peter Grimes | Headmaster
Reference:
Nagel, Michael C. – ‘Oh Boy!: Understanding the Neuroscience Behind Educating and Raising Boys’
